Thursday 31 May 2012

a day in the life of a chav

So as most will know Chav's are inbred, junkie, mama's boys but what do they do in one day?

The Chav wakes up to his ugly, Fat single mother screaming at him for stealing money out of her purse no doubt to pay for Lambrini or buckfast for later on.


Since the chav mum is also more than a little slow she forgets what she was talking about on seeing some fatty snack and stuff's her fat face. The chav goes back to sleep.
  The baby starts crying not long after but is left for an hour or 2 until the chav awakes and starts shouting at it for crying. The screaming continues for a very long time, At this point no one is sure if it's the chav or the baby but eventually the screaming stops.

note to chavs: Babies are not there for you to have then use to get money off the government and a council house. We all know that's what you do.

 So with the baby asleep from crying for hours the chav then lights up a mayfair fag,   the cheaper and rougher the better as far as the chav is concerned. not sure why but that's the way it is, maybe the chav isn't smart enough to learn thats why they don't smoke roll ups or get a job or wash!
  Not caring about the child the chav just smokes about the house/flat/ crack den.
Now it's about lunch time so the chav leaves it's hole and goes to mc Donald's wearing usually some horrid man made material one piece track suit, always with the hood up it's looks cooler the chav thinks.
 once it has filled it's face with the ironed meatless burger it goes scouting for a date usually something underage as they like older men but anything that's dumb enough not to shout rape will do. with there new slut they meet up with other chav's and cause trouble. smashing glass bottles in the road and being cheeky gits to old people seem to be what the chav calls fun.
  Night descends on an unsuspecting area where the chav's are drawn, underpasses   make good chav nests where they can group together to drink the earlier mentioned lambrini and attack people as chav's like to fight when there are 20 of them and 1 of you (of course that's just how tough chav's are)
   After they show the girl beasts from earlier how they are hard men in large groups  attacking single people and smashing bottles in the streets they try and get another one up the duff, mainly because chav's haven't heard of a condom and the things they sleep with are usually to young to know about the pill or just too dumb and they want to try and get a council house and more child benefits to spend on the new shitter trackie they saw in jjb sports but can't steal as they staff caught them the last time.
   with an area destroyed and the chav drunk on the lambrini they sneak back home to try it on with there sleeping, ugly, bucktoothed mom and repeat for the next 6 days.

  This is dedicated to all the mindless, useless, inbred, animal raping, insest mongering chav's out there. get a clue and get a job.
    

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